Lessons in the Trenches

Engaging in a protracted internet forum debate is both educational and monumentally wasteful. After a year of exchanging diatribes and messages on a local forum I’ve come to a few conclusions:

1 – I know less than I think but I know a surprising amount I didn’t even realize. When you go into an argument with only half the facts you’re gong to make silly mistakes and you’re gong to look like a fool. But doing so will invariably strengthen your ability to recognize your own weaknesses, and it will help you figure out just what it is you wanted to say in the first place.

2 – There are strange people in the world. Even locally the mix of opinions is diverse, although heavily…dangerously…frighteningly skewed in one direction. In any local sampling you will encounter people with beliefs and opinions so utterly at odds with everything you thought was true in the universe that it will scare the bejeezus out of you. Still, some people will surprise you with little nuggets of wisdom you didn’t know they possessed.

3 – Sacred cows really are sacred and you’d better watch your ass when slaughtering them. When I engage in an open discussion about something meaningful I do it just like I would with anything else. So sometimes I may say things that are rather harsh about something rather delicate. This tends to irritate people so much they will shut down any attempt to have an open discussion. This is a hard lesson and one that makes me feel kind of like Carl on Slingblade because I reckon I don’t understand it.

4 – People are fragile. Even over the internet they can get their feelings hurt and you end up in something akin to a drama situation. This is not good. Don’t get into that territory.

5 – Negativity is not good. Spending too much time as the guy who argues from the other side will get you into a mindset that is not healthy. Personally I’d rather be creating something than destroying something. But when you’re the only square guy in a room full of ovals who want to build oval doorways you really do run the risk of being the naysayer. Its challenging, its even important, and it can be fulfilling. But it is also rife with the slippery slopes that lead to constant negativity. Beware.

So, after having come to these conclusions a year later I've moved on from this particular mix of folks. There's only so much you can say or do before it gets tiresome, right?

Still, these topics are important. This is my town. I have a two-year-old son who will depend on his mom and dad to pave a clean way for him to learn and grow. At some point I may have to take on some of these people in a more public fashion, possibly in terms of schooling. Oh joy!